Monday, June 05, 2006

Nero's Coming To Get You!

For anyone concerned about getting trampled by the Four Horsemen tomorrow, I suggest you stay home and pass a quiet day with a copy of Hermann Hesse's Demian.

It's a bit of a dull book (in my opinion) but you have to admit he did originate the concept of the MILF.

"Neron Caesar," written in Hebrew letters, numerically totals up to 666, although in his fascinating and scholarly Guide to the Bible, Isaac Asimov suggests that the Number of the Beast is more likely to have been an oblique reference to Domitian, on the throne and persecuting merrily away at the time Revelations was written.

In fact, if I were you I'd toss the copy of "Demian" and read some Asimov instead; The Sensuous Dirty Old Man would be an excellent choice.

Asimov knew a thing or two about MILFs too.


At June 05, 2006 10:01 PM, Blogger Fletch said...

Hey now, don't diss Demian! (Can we still use a word like "diss" on the internet? Is it retro yet?) Its a great book for struggling adolescent boys who are head over heels in love with Teutonic mysticism. Just because you were never one doesn't mean that it was a bad book. I don't rail against Jane Eyre or the Bronte sister do I?

At June 05, 2006 10:06 PM, Blogger Beth said...

Point taken, although I've never been much of a Bronte fan.

Actually I was more expecting to get shot completely out of the water saying Hesse originated the concept of the MILF - and in a blog post about the Bible, no less!

At June 05, 2006 11:26 PM, Blogger Type A Mama said...

Hey, just wanted to say hi and that I've been enjoying reading your blog (that little bit about letting the freak flag fly made me laugh out loud) anyway I hope you don't mind I've put a link to your blog on my blog. Let me know if you're bothered by it and I'll remove it.

At June 06, 2006 7:15 PM, Blogger Fletch said...

Well, Mary was a virgin. Can that count as being a MILF?

I'd vote yes, but I can see a very interesting debate arising...

At June 06, 2006 7:16 PM, Blogger Fletch said...

Not that I necessarily want to, you know, with Mary. For the record.

At June 06, 2006 7:33 PM, Blogger Beth said...

Wow. For the second time in as many days, here is yet another apropos place to quote the lyrics from one of my favorite Stereolab songs (well, strictly speaking they're ALL favorites):

The Incredible He Woman

month one mary grows a mustache
in the second she grows a beard
in the third month her breasts fall off
the fourth month testicles appear
the fifth her penis shows its face
in the sixth month grows a foreskin
it took nine months made evident
experience, she gave it hands
in the seventh month, christ's sandals grow on her
in the eighth month, her chest becomes transparent
in the ninth wounds appear as christ is apparent
and then she was christ
and mary disappeared

I posted this as a comment on a friend's blog yesterday and only caused further confusion. Let's hope we do better here.

At June 06, 2006 9:06 PM, Blogger Fletch said...

Man, now I really don't want to make Mary a "proper" woman. I don't even know what this last sentence meant. I feel like having sex with the Virgin Mother is something that cannot be described in words.

At June 06, 2006 10:12 PM, Blogger Bill D said...

Beth, don't forget that you also posted the lyrics to The Incredible He Woman on my blog, too.

At June 06, 2006 10:35 PM, Blogger Beth said...

Yes, I mentioned that in passing in my comment...

...and this has been a pretty surreal conversation, by the way. Also the most comments I've ever gotten on one post, so how about that?

Let's go comment on the new one, shall we?

At June 07, 2006 6:54 PM, Blogger Fletch said...

But this old thread is so delightful.


Post a Comment

<< Home