I Got Your Evangelism Right Here

One day, about a year and a half ago, before most of my friends had quit or been fired, when I could still take a break for lunch, I was walking along the Bayfront in Corpus Christi. It was a beautiful day, I did not yet hate my job, and life, you know, was not so bad.

Near the T-heads I was approached by a couple of guys with pamphlets. "Would you like to hear about the Lord?" one asked me, proferring a tract.

Talk about a loaded question.

I was pretty clearly out for exercise - in a T-shirt, shorts and walking shoes, with my hair pulled back in a ponytail, and sweating like a pig - excuse me, I mean glowing in a most exuberantly ladylike fashion - so even if I did want to hear about the Lord, I really didn't want to be carrying some fruitcake piece of paper around. I smiled and shook my head and said, "No, thanks."

The guy followed after me. "Take it," he said. "Take it!"

"I don't have any pockets," I responded with some annoyance, quickening my pace and walking away from him.

"I'm trying to tell you about your Savior!" he yelled angrily after me. "JESUS CHRIST!!!"

You expect that sort of thing to happen in Corpus, with the oddly worded religious billboards on all the fences, the Christian feature in top position on the front page of the Caller-Times every Sunday (really!), and the enormous, creepy Jesus-of-the-Sea statue looming ominously over Ocean Drive.

You don't, however, really expect that sort of thing to happen at First Thursday on South Congress in Austin.

A representative of Capitol City Baptist Church, however, was kind enough to press a pamphlet on my 13-year-old daughter Thursday evening. "Please do not resent us for giving you this tract," it reads. "We love your soul, and we want to tell you, if you have never been born again, you are on your journey to a place where you will burn forever and ever."

Nice message for the kiddos, isn't it?

Good Lord. I've just spent several minutes trying to find their web site to post the link (and apparently they once had one but no longer do) and I guess I should count myself lucky they only threatened her.