Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Flunking Out of the School of Hard Knocks

HR sent out a blanket email today, telling us employees to beware of scams by fraudulent institutes of higher learning. They sent a link to an incredibly long list (which I sure hope we were allowed to visit during work hours; I wouldn't put it past HR to send a web link in a mass email, then slap you on the hand for clicking on it - your average HR employee holds a Bachelor's of Applied Idiocy from the University of Up Your Ass, Head) of colleges whose degrees are not honored in this state, or indeed anywhere else in our great nation. Not even those states where people don't express enthusiasm by exuberantly propelling themselves eighteen inches off the ground with repeated pistol fire. (Barbarians!)

I was curious, since I'm always seeing those University of Phoenix ads all over the internet, and have some rather pointed intentions, myself, of finally finishing my damn bachelor's already. I'm fully eligible for tuition reimbursement! So I must know: which are these "illegal" universities? And how do you know which ones to avoid?

It turns out you should avoid institutions that offer to sell you a degree for money without you having to do any coursework. Really? Amazing!! Who knew??

Oh, wait. EVERYBODY.

Well, I suppose it might come as a bit of a shock to HR.

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