Wash Your Hands

Apologies if this is gross, but I have a complaint to make.

Bitchez need to wash their hands after they go potty! I don't care if it's #1 or #2 (though #2 is worse). But if I'm in the bathroom and I see or hear you leave without washing, I am not shaking hands with you when we're introduced. That's just nasty.

It's not the women I work with, I should add. It's the women from that other division, the ones who for whatever reason prefer to come across the hall and use our restroom instead of the one nearer to them, the ones who always make a beeline for the handicapped stall, preferring a nice open space to spread out in while they do their business, so I end up having to get changed in the little stall.

Last week it happened while I was washing out my coffee cup (a kitchen, like a locker room, is something my building lacks). A woman from across the way flushed the toilet and emerged from her stall. "Sorry," I said, hastily rinsing my cup, "I'll be right out of your way."

"Oh, that's all right," she responded as she opened the door and walked out. I was shocked, frankly. "No!" I wanted to call after her. "No, it's not all right!"

Then it happened again yesterday: I, back from my lunchtime walk, sweaty, in workout clothes, backpack slung over my shoulder, walked into the restroom right behind a small blonde thing who headed straight for the handicapped stall. I sighed and changed in the smaller stall while she availed herself of the facilities, heard as she flushed, opened the stall door, and simply left.

What, was she raised in a barn?!?

The worst culprit I ever knew was the president of the internet marketing company from Hell I worked for in Corpus. She never washed her hands, never, no matter what she'd just done in the restroom. She's a well-known internet marketing personality, too. I could write "[Name of well-known internet marketing personality] never washes her hands in the restroom even after doing a #2!" on this blog, and people who were searching for information about her would read it. I'd get sued, I'm sure. But it would still be true.

Bitchez need to wash their hands!!